English Post No. 2

--1--

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

--2--

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.

--3--

Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.

--4--

If we're not supposed to eat animals, how come they're made out of meat?

--5--

Santa Claus has the right idea: visit people once a year

--6--

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure

--7--

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.

--8--

When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.

--9--

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'

--10--

I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.