Lito Lapid: Why did you write me such a long speech? The people were bored. Secretary: Sir, I gave you a 20-minute speech, plus the two duplicate copies you wanted.
Doctor: 6 months na lang ang buhay mo! Mag-asawa ka na ng pangit at bungangera.
Lalaki: Gagaling ba ako?
Doctor: Hind, pero at least, gugustuhin mo nang mamatay.
I was once asked by a curious 4 year old boy. A question that made my jaw drop and leave me puzzled till this time. The boy said, "Ano po ang animal sound ng giraffe?"
Ngayong valentine's day: Blue roses for lovers, white chocolates for crushes, pink balloons for friendships. Most of all, for loveless, red... Redhorse!
Patient: Magkano ang magpaface-lift?
Doctor: Complete treatment, P145000.
Patient: Ang mahal! Ano ba ang pinakamurang treatment para magmukha akong bata?
Doktor: Eto, tsupon, P20 lang.